Jo Eun-Ji Choi Kwang-il Kong Hyo-Jin
Hello? BlZARRE LOVE TRlANGLE
2030, the moon
Sir! What brings you here?
What about you?
l'm a close friend of the bride
ls that so?
l'm a friend of her father-in-law
but it seems we've arrived too early
We have too much time to kill
l heard
the groom's father
used to be a famous star?
ls it true?
Didn't you know?
He's famous for his stormy life
because of his thoughtless wife
Sounds very interesting
Can you tell me the whole story?
All of it?
lt's a long story
Would an hour and a half be enough?
lt's enough to watch
a whole movie
Well, okay then
but where do l begin from...?
Oh Doo-Chan's Comedy House 2002, Seoul
l've a friend who got married young
And one day this friend of mine
accidentally, looked into the window of his daughter
and my god!
his daughter was masturbating
with a huge cucumber
like this one!
You wouldn't believe it,
but it was soaked like a sponge
He got pissed off at what he saw
So he started drinking in broad daylight
His daughter discovered her father
heavily drunk and asked him
Why the hell are you drinking in this broad daylight?
My friend responded.
Hey!
l'm having a drink with my son-in-law
lf anyone lonesome tonight
take this and make the most of it
Hurry up l'm Late!
Hurry up Hurry up
Honey where are you going?
l'm in a hurry for a show
Such an asshole
l'm starting a new TV show, remember?
Don't stay out too late
Honey!
Give me some money before you go
Eun-Hee!
The greatest entertainer who's swept
all the broadcasting awards, 3 years alone!
A man who makes
45 million people laugh
but never himself!
The greatest show host of all time
Oh!
Oh Doo!
Oh Doo-Chan!
ln one public poll
for 1 ,000 men and women in Korea
What is the first thing men do after sex?
At No. 3, 168 people answered that they light a cigarette!
At No. 2, 221 answered that they fall into sleep right away!
Finally in No. 1 504 answered
that they go back home to their wives
See you after the commercial break
Be quiet!
l'll get his autographs Oh Doo-Chan
Alright! Alright!
Keep it down!
A town that never sleeps
even with worth millions rely on good medicine
the best clearing mind medicine Bezoar, KwangDong
Hey!
What's my schedule for tomorrow
Fly off to Busan then back to Seoul
for a 2:00 pm broadcast
At five an interview and at seven
a meeting with the writers
Can't we cancel Busan?
Shit! lt's you who chose the autograph signing
at a department store
lt pays good
You know my wife loves money
Sorry to say this
but she is a real bitch
You need to get some rest
lf you die right now,
l'm sure she wouldn't even care
Fucking whore
Hey, get up
hey! Doo-Chan!
Get up!
Honey! l'll be late
Fix the noodles for yourself
Sorry!
She's fucking another man
How do you know...?
Look!
l know this private detective
He can find out, you know
Shut up! l told you it's not true
l just don't want you to regret it later
Don't yell at me, man
Your show is on the way up
lt's all because of you, sir
What's this?
lt looks nice
Yeah?
lt's Du Pont
Thank you
Please stop that
You're like a daughter to me
Sir!
l apologize you for not showing my respects lately
l'm terribly sorry
lt's a small gift of mine
What is it?
A golden pig, sir
l know
Wait a minute!
lf it's for asking me to cast
your wife again, forget it
Last year, l've gladly put her in
one of my soap opera
l've always done whatever you've asked me, but...
Don't you remember?
Scheduled to end in four hours
but ran for more than 30 hours
Such a bad performance!
Finished one minute
before dead line
l thought it was the end of my career
Sir, it's my last begging
Have you ever seen me
turning down any gifts?
lf l don't put her on your show, she'll divorce me
That's a good news
That bitch...
Sorry but she's cut out to be
a madam of room salon
Tell her that's what she could be
Listen...
l know you're always working hard
but l'm doing nothing
l don't even have a baby, so l'm really bored
So?
So, l want to work
Doing nothing is much better
Last time you lost my 500 Million
for the stupid gallery
l was too naive then
But this time it's a real deal
l can success
'cause l know myself fully
What do you want to do?
A room salon
What?
A friend of mine wants me
to be her partner
When you have to buy drinks,
you can spend money on me
Are you asking me to turn my wife into a bar maid?
Not a bar maid
l'll be a madam
lsn't a Mafia boss a gangster?
Then, put me on that TV show
for crying out loud
What?
She's fucking a Taekwon master!
What are you talking about?
My friend kept close watch on her
She's been to the gym everyday
What for?
What are you, dumb?
You think she went to learn Taekwon?
Guess she's there to learn Judo, huh?
lt's not funny at all
Quit smoking!
Your test shows the worst shape
Are you saying l'm dying?
l can't sleep without any sleeping pills
No. You need to let go of all the stresses
Doctor
l...
l just wish for a baby
and a peaceful life
Sorry to say this but it'll be difficult
for her to have a baby
cause of too many abortions
Fucking whore
Are you satisfied now?
Are you?
Looks very awkward
yes
l've only just started
ls that so?
Why are you taking Taekwon lessons?
Look, The Taekwon master is a woman
Okay?
But there're men in your class?
Ah!
Sorry l didn't mean it
You promised me to take me out for a dinner?
What the fuck is this?
Sorry but it's a really high-paying event
How much?
20 Million Won and it's all yours
Okay, then
Even if you're busy, don't skip lunch
See you tomorrow, bye!
She'll be lonesome tonight
Hey
What? Are you worried?
Pull over
Why?
Just do it
What's the matter?
Get out!
What is it?
Get your butt out!
Shit, what the fuck?
Honey!
Uh..Ah!
ls it boring?
Sorry, but yes, it is
Boring, huh?
Which one do you prefer?
lnteresting beginning with a boring end
or the opposite?
Suddenly a high school classroom?
Quiet!
l'll tell you how she ended up
being caught in Taekwon gym
by her husband,
while making love to her lesbian lover
BAE EUN HEE
Stop interrupting and just listen
Sit over there
Hey!
Are you all right?
lt happens all the time
Let's go to the bath house
l don't have any money
Hey, come over here
Thanks, guys
Let's go
Um... you know before...
thanks... a lot
lt's the first time a woman
did me any good
Men did some good for you?
Of course
that's why my life is in such a mess
- Can l ask you something? - Sure
ls it true that you were expelled
from the other school...
because you were involved with a teacher?
That's what people say
Eun-Hee!
What am l going to do?
Eun-Hee!
We should wait until your graduation
lt's less than a year
l can wait
Sounds like he's a cool teacher
Of course
He used to send us food
because we were so poor
He was good to everyone, even to the ugly ones
Yeah...
lt's hard to do that
He was a member of the Teachers Union
But a teacher
who's dying to get him out of the school
in school foundation side...
...caught us coming out of the motel
They fired him from the school
and l got expelled
Still seeing him?
No
l'm glad
Why?
Huh?
Nothing. l mean...
Even if l wanna see him, l can't
He committed suicide after a few days of his dismiss
l wish my breasts were as pretty as yours
No, They're too small
l wish it was much bigger
None of the girls on TV
have small tits like me
With a boob-job
l'll be a star
l've saved up some money
l want the one at the bottom right
l like that one myself
A fine taste
But this breast enlargement
will cost you a lot of money
a lot...
man...
l have the money 300 Thousand Won
300 thousand?
Yes, here!
Look, l know l'm cheap,
but this is not a double-eyelid surgery
shit...
l knew this would happen
l'll come up with the money
Just squeeze her into your schedule, ok?
Can l ask you something?
How come a rich woman like yourself
massages customers in person?
To stock up the money
What for?
l wanna be the the first one
to buy the artificial eyes
when the time comes
oh...
l see
Well...
Can l ask you another question?
l took a bath with a girl
and stroked her breasts with a soap
lt made me feel really good
somehow l began sweating
ls there something wrong with me?
Didn't you want her to touch you?
Uh... l don't know
How does it feel?
what?
oh...
Nice
but a little embarrassed
That's all for today!
lf you'd been such a good woman
you'd never have fallen for a Moor man...
l am sorry, l'll do it again
- Hahaha - Hmm...
lf you'd been such a good woman
you'd never have fallen for a Moor man
lt's foul and lewd, jumping into
the bosom of that filthy Moor
Such a disgrace
- Enough, stop! - Hahaha
You're keep saying 'filthy Moor'
Do you even know who the 'Moor' is?
- Hahaha - Hahaha
Excuse me?
Do you know who Shakespeare is?
- Hahaha - Hahaha
After my mom left my dad brought another woman
Soon after, it was my dad who ran off
All of a sudden
l found myself living with
a woman l don't even know
Have you ever heard of such fucked-up story before?
ls she that woman?
People just assume pretty girls
have no brain
But l don't wanna be a star
thatjust comes and goes
l want to be a real actress
And when l am a star
l won't hide my dark past
l'm gonna be proud of it
Hwang Keum-Sook! Hwang Keum-Sook!
Fight it!
Hwang Keum-Sook! Hwang Keum-Sook!
Keum-Sook, Fighting! Hwang Keum-Sook!
Yes, yes! That's it!
l'm sorry l lost
Thank you for the money
Don't you think it's too cheap even for a quick surgery?
By any chance, could it be 1 million for each breast?
What?
Then do just one breast this time
and the other when we get the money
How did you get the money?
A blind woman lent it to me
Thanks
but how are you gonna pay back?
Are you saying l have to pay it back?
l don't believe what l'm hearing
What are you talking about?
l didn't ask you to borrow the money, did l?
What a bitch!
You should be ready! lt'll hurt you to death, l bet
Ah!
Keum-Sook! Keum-Sook!
Keum-Sook!
Hey!
Keum-Sook! Keum-Sook!
Squeeze it! Catch it!
Keum-Sook! Shit!
Let's stop it
Let's go
First Approach One!
Two!
Three!
Four!
Five!
Second Approach One!
Taekwon!
Two!
Three!
Four!
Five!
Third Approach One!
Taekwondo!
Two!
Three!
Four!
What's this?
Happy birthday
l measured the size
when you were sleeping
You also fondled me, didn't you?
Did not
Thanks, anyway
Allow me
Men always expect
something in return
You won't be like that, will you?
What? Will you give me something in return?
One more glasses please
Yesterday a different...
Yes! Yes! Five Birds!
lt's five birds l won!
Hahaha
Shit!
Another eight and
l'd have won...
Hahaha
Sorry!
Shall l lose once for you?
Shut up!
l'll strip you bare!
l've got five royals!
- five royals! - Hey! Hey!
Hey, it's a five royal!
You shouldn't be crying You're a master of Taekwon
My love
l deared to death
is gone but the memories...
What time should we leave?
You want to go already?
We're out of money
Really?
Wanna keep on dancing
Aren't you tired?
Sorry, so sorry
Wait
lt'd mean so much if we danced to one more song
Later, let's go
ls it here?
What is it?
This is our room
We've been looking at you dancing
and you girls are really something
lf you don't feel like
joining us
just say no
Don't!
Let's just have some fun
Put it down!
Don't you like us?
- Will split your... - Don' do...
You're one feisty bitch
Ah! Ah!
Come here you fucking asshole
Please forgive us
Please officer...
Hear us out, officer..., please?
Look, it'll give you more trouble
lf you keep try to bribe me,
l'll have to book you also
Please...!
21 Month Later
Thanks
How is EUN-HEE doing?
She's got a son now
How much does the bone marrow transplant cost?
lt'll be about 100 million Won
at least
How much do you have?
300 thousand Won
Where the fuck is the baby's father?
l don't know who the father is
l'm trying to figure out who he is
Just great, isn't it?
Without my son
l'm gonna kill myself
Hey, we're late!
Why did you book that worthless TV show?
Didn't you know?
lf you make a good impression
to the people in the show,
lt'll lead you to huge bucks later on
You should know better
Hurry up!
l'm sorry we're late!
You promised to be in time?
A heavy traffic
Hurry and put these gowns on
Ok
Say hello to the mother of the baby
l really appreciate you being here
Oh, not at all...
l've seen you before
You look much better in person
Uh, thank you...
l'm your big fan
Thank you
Sorry!
Cut! Cut!
Let's go with the eye-drops
lf he doesn't show tears
we can't raise any money
We have no choice
to save Chul-Soo
''PIease save our IittIe ChuI-Soo!''
Cut!
Personally it's so difficult to see
this baby in so much pain
Our precious little Chul-Soo needs
this operation as soon as possible
So give us a call
The number is 700-5080
Doo-Chan, heart-breaking for you l assume
Share us your thoughts
Doo-Chan?
Yes...
That...
last scene where l'm crying?
l couldn't cry,
so l've put the eye-drops
What the fuck is he saying?
ls he out of his mind?
l'm so sorry
This is what l am
But on the way home that night,
l felt something from the bottom of my heart
My mother told me to be honest, but l was not
l'm so sorry
l wasn't planning on doing it
But l'm so ashamed of myself of doing such
And a little time with Chul-Soo
taught me a valuable lesson
l've realised l've committed such a fraud
From now on...
For desiring Chul-Soo
to be healthy and well again
l, personally, will donate
the entire amount
required for Chul-Soo's operation
And l beg for your forgiveness
He sure knows how to pull off
a great show
What do you think about the show?
What a performance!
ls something bothering you?
You look so worried
How would you know?
Well?
You're right
l'm troubled
Eun-Hee's son is sick
So she needs money for the surgery
a lot...
Are you asking me to lend you the money again?
That's exactly what l am asking
Do l look alike a millionnire?
How much?
100 million
l'll give it to you
Really?
But give me something in return
What?
Hey!
Just kidding. Let's just drink
Why aren't you drinking?
Pissed off
because of the money?
No
l've gotta go somewhere later
So don't mind me and just drink up
So...
the operation is tomorrow
how do you feel?
l feel like l'm waiting for my own operation...
l wish everything goes well
oh, yes...
What about you, Chul-Soo's mom?
Yes, me?
l just thank Mr Oh for everything
The baby is not breathing
Please...
Sleep over with me
Maybe, next time
l have to go somewhere
Okay, go then
Let me help you
Don't bother l can take care of myself
2 hours Later
So sorry, but l'll pay you back
l promise
Wait!
2 years later
Hey!
l'm sorry
What happened to the dog?
He couldn't watch the house,
so l got rid of him
Eun-Hee...
Why don't you ask me
about Eun-Hee?
She got married
l know
A low-life bitch!
l owe you...
thanks
Just go on with your life
l'm really gonna
give it a try
Hurry up
l'm Late
Hurry up! Hurry up!
Honey where are you going?
l'm in a hurry for a show
Such an asshole
l'm starting a new TV show, remember?
Don't stay out too late
Honey!
Give me some money, before you go
Eun-Hee!
Did you like it?
l liked it because you lasted a lot longer than my husband
l guess you've got
a lot of experience in jail?
But people weren't much
into sex in jail
like they say they do
lt must had been tough on you...
Honey! l'll be late
Fix the noodles for yourself
Huh!
Honey, you're home early!
Where have you been?
Got angry with me?
Running around all the time
you're never gonna get pregnant
Do you remember my friend
Keum-Sook?
Her mother passed away
such a shame...
lt seems like people around you
keep passing away once a week
And how could you wear
clothes like that to a funeral?
'cause it's so sudden
Anyway
Keum-Sook asked for your autograph
Her mother dies and she asks for
a celebrity's autograph?
ls that weird?
OK
l've made up the story about the autograph
But it's true that her grandmother died
You've said it's her mother
Who's the bastard this time?
Are you saying
l'm lying?
Why don't you check
my vagina like last time?
How much is it?
4 million
What?
A bag for a 4 million?
What a rip-off
Hey!
Not so expensive
to hang out
with rich people
ok?
What made your husband to marry
someone so thoughtless like you?
How would l know?
l married him because he promised to put me on TV
Not because he's gonna pay
for Chul-Soo's operation?
That too, l guess
lf l'd made money for the operation
would you have married me?
lt doesn't matter
He's dead
Don't tell me you stole
the money to save Chul-soo
l didn't ask
Shit...
Having to live with you
l pity for your husband, really
- l didn't beg him - Just drop the whole thing
Let's go! Come!
You promised me to take me out for a dinner?
Sorry
but it's a really high-paying event
How much?
20 Million Won
and it's all yours
Okay, then
Even if you're busy don't skip lunch
See you tomorrow, bye!
She'll be lonesome tonight
Hey
What? Are you worried?
Pull over
Do it right
What'll you say if your husband
asks you to show him again?
l'm not that bad. Look can't you see...
See, l'm good
No lt's not
The posture's the most important thing
in martial arts!
You have to keep the hands up
all the time
- Stop!
- Why? - Because you're tickling me
Oh my god!
Honey!
ARRRRRRG!
What floor is this?
So sorry, honey!
l can't believe l've cheated on you
But you know, l can't live without you...
How could you say that?
Huh?
How could you do this to me?
You, You...!
l'm gonna make your life
as miserable as mine
You'll pay for this!
Okay, then do as you wish What else can l say?
But give me half of
what you have for alimony
You must be out of your mind
So you gonna be happy with that bitch with my money?
Do you love her?
Yes
Okay, then l'll do as you wish
But not for free
Wow... finally, the husband begins to strike back, right?
At this point, the devilish nature
of his cunningness takes off
And the thoughtless wife accepts
this devilish proposal too
l'd have to say her consent was based
solely on devilish greed
What kind of proposal was it?
lt took me
a long time to understand
and forgive them
Hatred and greed
were monstrous elements
to force all merits of human
But...
lf their story ended as such
l didn't have to come
to bless the wedding
l realized the secret of,
which goodness will prevail in the end
So you'll share that secret with me?
Yes
The truth
that blooms from
the filthiest of all places
Standing!
Kicking once!
One!
Two!
l can't believe what you're saying
You fucking slut!
lf you refuse,
l'll be driven out home penniless
Hey!
ls it okay if the person you love
sleeps with somebody for money?
Sleeping with a man isn't selling
Remember, you're a lesbian
You're out of your mind!
lt's our chance
to make a new start
We need the money
and we have no other choice
And you're an accomplice in this mess
An accomplice?
You put me in this mess
What?
- Taekwondo! - Taekwondo!
Taekwon...
ARRG!
What do l do!
You're not the only one
who's suffering
Go away
l believe you'll help me
Do you think a stunt like this
would hurt Eun-Hee?
Don't you know her?
Eun-Hee is not the only one
l'm trying to revenge
l see
Hurry up and let's get it done
Come in!
Sit there and try to feel
how shitty l felt that day
3 months later
Didn't you know your
ovulating schedule?
l tried to calculate but...
You got pregnant so easy
l couldn't even if l've tried
l got myself drunk and thought
l wanted to kill myself
But l feel much better now
that l've made up my mind
That's good
lt's not so hard to get an abortion
lt's all over in a flash and
it doesn't even hurt that much
l'll go with you
No, l'll have the baby
What?!
l want to be a mother
Why shouldn't lesbians
be a mother?
Law doesn't bind it either
Thank you Thank you
l want the baby too
But...
l'm worried about Eun-Hee
Please...
Over my dead body
Keum-Sook, please...
Over my dead body
Get rid of it!
l said ''no''
This whole thing is insane
lf you have the baby
what'll happen to the three of us?
l guarantee you, this asshole will
never let you see the child
He'll abandon us without leaving us any money
Don't say that
As l get to know Doo-Chan more...
Get to know Doo-Chan?
So you find men interesting?
Take that back
The truth makes you feel guilty, doesn't it?
You've something on your mind that l shouldn't know?
You are so pathetic
Yeah, l'm a pathetic bitch...
l give birth to a child without a father
l get married less than 3 months after the baby's death
That's enough
Then have an affair with a bitch like yourself...
What?
Hit me, hit me!
l won't, 'cause l might kill you, you bitch!
Stop the car! l said stop the car!
Just shut up, you worthless shit!
You worthless piece of shit!
Leave me alone!
Let go of me!
l can't take it anymore!
So that's the great truth that blooms from
the most filthiest of all places
The thoughtless wife finally realized
the sacrifice of Keum-Sook
a real sacrifice for her
Keum-Sook!
lt's been a long time
l got married
Why?
l couldn't stand being poor
Keum-Sook!
What the fuck are you looking at?
Put this on
Let's have a baby
l've never had a diarrhea
because l digest everything well
Sitting on the toilet, l thought over
and realized what l had been
Thanks
Everything'll be all right!
Let's discuss where
we're gonna live first
l'm not going anywhere
l've put too much effort
decorating this place
l'll stay at the Taekwon gym
No way
The baby and the mother need
a nice place like this house
Right?
lt'd be good for prenatal care, wouldn't it?
l don't believe this
Then
let's all live together here
lt's a huge house
We only have to use separate rooms
Yeah? So then who am l supposed
to have sex with?
Well, somebody has to go back and forth
Who would that be? You?
Why not? lt isn't a bad idea
You have to choose one of us
l can't see you going back and forth
The same with me. Make a choice
Lalala lala lalala
We ran together
with our hands together
in a bed under the blue sky
where the flower and the butterfly flew by
going around and around the pillow
We shared our love
we shared our walk
chattering away
wondering away
where the end would be
looking at silver ripple by the bed
What?
Hospital?
Okay, l'm on my way
One day, on an unexpected day
l ran down
Hold it little longer, ok?
from the bed
with love and hate
clock by the bed
spills its alarm
me by the bed
spill my tears
Quite a story, isn't it?
Yes
but l have a question
Doo-Chan was excluded from
any sexual act in a same house
How did he manage
his sexual desire?
You're only interested in sexual matters, aren't you?
He managed through masturbation
but this didn't last for long
Eventually he cruised whores
such as Yellow house at lncheon
anyway...
then he ran out of his money
Why would he run out of money?
l was about to get to that
The press found out that
he's living with two women
All TV stations cut him loose
ending his career
and doomed
He'd to return to
the life of masturbation
And one day
Honey?
Look at this
lt's alright
Hurry up
Everytime when l have a melon
it reminds me of Doo-Chan
Sir, the ceremony's about to begin
Yes
Please let the groom enter
The officiator of this ceremony is
Honorable doctor of medical and philosophy
Dr. SUK Man-Chang
Many have travelled from the Earth
to celebrate
this young groom and groom,
Chul-Soo Oh and Myung-Hoon Bok
As l stand here today
the past rushes
through my mind
On this great day
l must tell you
how the three parents...
...of the groom have met
and gave birth to a son...
The story of a bizarre love triangle begins
2002, Seoul
at a comedy club in Seoul
l've a friend
who got married young